1
00:00:07,147 --> 00:00:08,148
Are you okay?

2
00:00:08,148 --> 00:00:08,849
Yes.

3
00:00:08,849 --> 00:00:09,717
Does it hurt?

4
00:00:09,717 --> 00:00:10,751
Yes, Sue.

5
00:00:10,751 --> 00:00:12,219
It hurts.

6
00:00:12,219 --> 00:00:13,754
I got a bag of peas on it.

7
00:00:13,754 --> 00:00:15,189
Maybe we should just give up.

8
00:00:15,189 --> 00:00:16,757
No. No, no, no, no, I'm sorry.

9
00:00:16,757 --> 00:00:18,659
I'm being... I'm being a cranky bear.

10
00:00:18,659 --> 00:00:20,828
I... I'm just... I'm
frustrated with the situation,

11
00:00:20,828 --> 00:00:23,130
but it's a minor setback.
We'll figure it out.

12
00:00:23,130 --> 00:00:25,232
Every time we try to hook
up you just fall through me

13
00:00:25,232 --> 00:00:26,867
and really hurt yourself.

14
00:00:26,867 --> 00:00:28,802
I know but it's a... it's
a good hurt. I like it!

15
00:00:28,802 --> 00:00:31,538
Plus you've destroyed,
like, everything you own.

16
00:00:31,538 --> 00:00:32,773
Yeah, I know. I feel like

17
00:00:32,773 --> 00:00:34,842
a drunk old wrestler or something.

18
00:00:34,842 --> 00:00:36,577
Okay, let me just try one more time.

19
00:00:36,577 --> 00:00:38,145
I really don't think it's gonna work out!

20
00:00:38,145 --> 00:00:40,581
Sue, please!

21
00:00:40,581 --> 00:00:41,749
Okay.

22
00:00:41,749 --> 00:00:43,117
Sweet.

23
00:00:43,117 --> 00:00:44,151
Okay, maybe you're right.

24
00:00:44,151 --> 00:00:45,519
Maybe we should stop.

25
00:00:45,519 --> 00:00:47,421
I don't think I can do this.

26
00:00:47,421 --> 00:00:49,690
What... what?

27
00:00:49,690 --> 00:00:51,659
I don't think I can be in a relationship

28
00:00:51,659 --> 00:00:53,527
if we can't touch each other.

29
00:00:53,527 --> 00:00:54,862
What does... what does that mean?

30
00:00:54,862 --> 00:00:56,163
What are you saying?

31
00:00:56,163 --> 00:00:57,798
I'm saying...

32
00:00:57,798 --> 00:01:01,502
I think...

33
00:01:01,502 --> 00:01:04,805
we should bring another
girl into the bedroom.

34
00:01:04,805 --> 00:01:06,306
What... what?

35
00:01:06,306 --> 00:01:08,542
I think we should have possession sex.

36
00:01:11,145 --> 00:01:15,145



37
00:01:20,254 --> 00:01:22,489
(screaming)

38
00:01:22,489 --> 00:01:26,489



39
00:01:43,577 --> 00:01:44,778
A'ight. This one...

40
00:01:44,778 --> 00:01:46,380
is gonna give you a body high.

41
00:01:46,380 --> 00:01:48,515
This one is gonna be a mental high.

42
00:01:48,515 --> 00:01:51,418
And this one is more
of an existential high.

43
00:01:51,418 --> 00:01:52,853
What's an existential high?

44
00:01:52,853 --> 00:01:54,254
Well, that depends.

45
00:01:54,254 --> 00:01:57,357
What kind of a man is you?

46
00:01:57,357 --> 00:01:58,592
I don't know.

47
00:01:58,592 --> 00:02:00,494
I don't...

48
00:02:00,494 --> 00:02:02,162
I don't know.

49
00:02:02,162 --> 00:02:03,697
I don't know, Tyson, I don't know!

50
00:02:03,697 --> 00:02:05,499
Okay, okay, it's okay, it's okay.

51
00:02:05,499 --> 00:02:07,301
Definitely not this one then.

52
00:02:07,301 --> 00:02:09,503
Okay, give me whichever one is the freest.

53
00:02:09,503 --> 00:02:11,505
- Freest?
- I'm sorry. The most free.

54
00:02:11,505 --> 00:02:13,307
What, you think this
is a charity drive, yo?

55
00:02:13,307 --> 00:02:15,542
No! I don't... Tyson, come on!

56
00:02:15,542 --> 00:02:16,677
Don't be a dink, man. I need it!

57
00:02:16,677 --> 00:02:17,778
I need it so I can have sex

58
00:02:17,778 --> 00:02:18,846
with my ghost girlfriend.

59
00:02:18,846 --> 00:02:19,680
Why don't you just get

60
00:02:19,680 --> 00:02:21,081
a live girlfriend?

61
00:02:21,081 --> 00:02:22,282
I don't know! I've tried.

62
00:02:22,282 --> 00:02:23,584
I just... I...

63
00:02:23,584 --> 00:02:24,818
I wasn't socialized properly.

64
00:02:24,818 --> 00:02:26,587
I had a rough childhood.

65
00:02:26,587 --> 00:02:28,355
Oh, you thought you had it bad?

66
00:02:28,355 --> 00:02:29,289
Want to know what they used to call me

67
00:02:29,289 --> 00:02:30,557
in high school?

68
00:02:30,557 --> 00:02:31,625
You know those little sugar packets?

69
00:02:31,625 --> 00:02:33,393
- Like Sweet'N Lows?
- No!

70
00:02:33,393 --> 00:02:34,828
They used to call me Sugar Packets,

71
00:02:34,828 --> 00:02:36,697
asshole, 'cause I'm white!

72
00:02:36,697 --> 00:02:37,831
I don't know what to tell you, man.

73
00:02:37,831 --> 00:02:39,366
Roofie used to give me drugs

74
00:02:39,366 --> 00:02:41,568
in exchange for my beautiful friendship.

75
00:02:41,568 --> 00:02:45,172
Do I look like Roofie to you?

76
00:02:45,172 --> 00:02:47,741
Yeah, kinda.

77
00:02:47,741 --> 00:02:48,909
Oh, hell no.

78
00:02:48,909 --> 00:02:49,643
Really?

79
00:02:49,643 --> 00:02:51,245
Yeah!

80
00:02:51,245 --> 00:02:52,579
That's cool, man.

81
00:02:52,579 --> 00:02:54,481
Hey, I'll tell you what.

82
00:02:54,481 --> 00:02:56,650
I'll give you one mushroom for free.

83
00:02:56,650 --> 00:02:58,285
- One mushroom?
- Yeah!

84
00:02:58,285 --> 00:03:00,654
Is that enough to get anybody messed up?

85
00:03:00,654 --> 00:03:02,523
Works on me!

86
00:03:02,523 --> 00:03:03,724
Yeah.

87
00:03:06,627 --> 00:03:07,861
Yeah.

88
00:03:07,861 --> 00:03:09,396



89
00:03:09,396 --> 00:03:11,765
Okay, how about

90
00:03:11,765 --> 00:03:15,765
couple seeks woman for spiritual threesome?

91
00:03:16,403 --> 00:03:18,205
- Aw, that's sweet.
- Good.

92
00:03:18,205 --> 00:03:20,207
But if we want our ad to get a response,

93
00:03:20,207 --> 00:03:21,341
it needs to be less subtle.

94
00:03:21,341 --> 00:03:23,210
- Oh.
- Like...

95
00:03:23,210 --> 00:03:24,711
horny ghost girl

96
00:03:24,711 --> 00:03:27,848
seeks fun-loving female to possess

97
00:03:27,848 --> 00:03:31,318
for night of sin with
her hungry human lover.

98
00:03:31,318 --> 00:03:32,586
Whoa.

99
00:03:32,586 --> 00:03:33,687
Did you just make that up right now?

100
00:03:33,687 --> 00:03:34,688
- Mm-hm.
- That's good.

101
00:03:34,688 --> 00:03:35,823
You're really good.

102
00:03:35,823 --> 00:03:36,657
You could have been an author

103
00:03:36,657 --> 00:03:38,792
of ghost erotica.

104
00:03:38,792 --> 00:03:40,561
I was.

105
00:03:40,561 --> 00:03:41,228
Okay.

106
00:03:41,228 --> 00:03:42,830
And...

107
00:03:42,830 --> 00:03:43,564
posted.

108
00:03:43,564 --> 00:03:45,299
There we go!

109
00:03:45,299 --> 00:03:46,867
I gotta say though, I
don't have a lot of faith

110
00:03:46,867 --> 00:03:48,402
in the people inside the internet.

111
00:03:48,402 --> 00:03:49,436
I mean, do you think anybody's

112
00:03:49,436 --> 00:03:50,337
really gonna respond to this?

113
00:03:50,337 --> 00:03:52,206
You've got mail.

114
00:03:52,206 --> 00:03:54,208
Look at that! We got one response.

115
00:03:54,208 --> 00:03:55,342
You've got mail.

116
00:03:55,342 --> 00:03:56,476
You've got mail.

117
00:03:56,476 --> 00:03:57,511
You've got mail.

118
00:03:57,511 --> 00:03:59,346
You've got...

119
00:03:59,346 --> 00:04:00,914
Okay, well.

120
00:04:00,914 --> 00:04:02,382
Thank you for coming.

121
00:04:02,382 --> 00:04:04,117
Uh, why don't you start off by telling us

122
00:04:04,117 --> 00:04:05,319
a little bit about you.

123
00:04:05,319 --> 00:04:06,186
Okay, great.

124
00:04:06,186 --> 00:04:07,321
My name is Jordana,

125
00:04:07,321 --> 00:04:08,388
I live in Brooklyn,

126
00:04:08,388 --> 00:04:09,790
and I'm a first responder.

127
00:04:09,790 --> 00:04:12,259
Uh, no. Actually you
are the third responder.

128
00:04:12,259 --> 00:04:13,360
Uh, the first responder

129
00:04:13,360 --> 00:04:14,561
was a little too educated,

130
00:04:14,561 --> 00:04:16,196
and it intimidated Sue over here.

131
00:04:16,196 --> 00:04:17,564
What? I wasn't the one
who felt intimidated.

132
00:04:17,564 --> 00:04:20,234
And the second responder,

133
00:04:20,234 --> 00:04:22,369
she had a face that looked like, uh,

134
00:04:22,369 --> 00:04:24,104
like a baby bird that had been beaten

135
00:04:24,104 --> 00:04:25,539
with a tennis racket.

136
00:04:25,539 --> 00:04:28,842
Hi, I'm Allison Kelley, and I'm a model.

137
00:04:28,842 --> 00:04:30,878
Allison the model.

138
00:04:30,878 --> 00:04:32,412
Okay.

139
00:04:32,412 --> 00:04:34,781
So why do you want to engage

140
00:04:34,781 --> 00:04:36,483
in possession sex?

141
00:04:36,483 --> 00:04:39,219
Well, I never knew my father

142
00:04:39,219 --> 00:04:40,888
until one day I found out

143
00:04:40,888 --> 00:04:42,456
I accidentally had sex with him

144
00:04:42,456 --> 00:04:45,792
as part of a photo-bang on his boat.

145
00:04:45,792 --> 00:04:47,594
So now normal sex with a man

146
00:04:47,594 --> 00:04:51,331
just does nothing for me.

147
00:04:51,331 --> 00:04:52,699
What else? I'm a vegan.

148
00:04:52,699 --> 00:04:54,167
Oh, next!

149
00:04:54,167 --> 00:04:55,202
I should just mention

150
00:04:55,202 --> 00:04:56,336
that above my pubic region

151
00:04:56,336 --> 00:04:57,838
I have a couple of tattoos

152
00:04:57,838 --> 00:05:01,838
in the shape of a herpes outbreak.

153
00:05:02,509 --> 00:05:06,213
So Beth, other than your
gorgeous Tempur-Pedics,

154
00:05:06,213 --> 00:05:07,748
what else should we know about you?

155
00:05:07,748 --> 00:05:10,584
Well, um, I used to be a school teacher,

156
00:05:10,584 --> 00:05:12,185
but then I quit when I realized

157
00:05:12,185 --> 00:05:13,487
I could make more money doing odd jobs

158
00:05:13,487 --> 00:05:15,155
off Craigslist.

159
00:05:15,155 --> 00:05:16,623
Yeah, one day I could be cleaning

160
00:05:16,623 --> 00:05:18,659
some dude's apartment
wearing only a bikini,

161
00:05:18,659 --> 00:05:20,827
and the next I could be ghost-writing

162
00:05:20,827 --> 00:05:21,862
a term paper about

163
00:05:21,862 --> 00:05:24,298
acclaimed actor James McAvoy.

164
00:05:24,298 --> 00:05:25,532
Tonight I'm actually entering

165
00:05:25,532 --> 00:05:27,601
a, uh, a wet T-shirt contest,

166
00:05:27,601 --> 00:05:29,836
which, ironically, I need to win

167
00:05:29,836 --> 00:05:31,705
if I'm gonna pay this month's water bill.

168
00:05:31,705 --> 00:05:33,206
Kevin, she's like you!

169
00:05:33,206 --> 00:05:35,809
I never entered a wet T-shirt contest!

170
00:05:35,809 --> 00:05:38,145
I mean, not on purpose.

171
00:05:38,145 --> 00:05:40,180
No, I mean she's a freelancer.

172
00:05:40,180 --> 00:05:42,616
Oh, oh yeah! Oh nice!

173
00:05:42,616 --> 00:05:45,585
Yeah, I... I, too, am my own boss.

174
00:05:45,585 --> 00:05:49,189
Though I find he's kind
of a dick sometimes.

175
00:05:49,189 --> 00:05:50,857
Fortunately I'm really organized,

176
00:05:50,857 --> 00:05:52,326
so I don't really have a problem with that.

177
00:05:52,326 --> 00:05:54,661
No way! She's organized just like you!

178
00:05:54,661 --> 00:05:56,096
Can I just say something?

179
00:05:56,096 --> 00:05:57,397
When I read your guys' story,

180
00:05:57,397 --> 00:05:59,800
I thought it was the most romantic thing

181
00:05:59,800 --> 00:06:01,501
I'd ever heard.

182
00:06:01,501 --> 00:06:03,437
I mean, two people unable to consummate

183
00:06:03,437 --> 00:06:04,638
their relationship because one of them

184
00:06:04,638 --> 00:06:06,440
doesn't have a body?

185
00:06:06,440 --> 00:06:08,742
When I read that, I knew
I was supposed to see it,

186
00:06:08,742 --> 00:06:11,745
and, uh, I had to respond
before someone flagged it

187
00:06:11,745 --> 00:06:13,847
and it was taken down.

188
00:06:13,847 --> 00:06:17,617
I would be honored to be your sex vessel.

189
00:06:17,617 --> 00:06:19,353



190
00:06:19,353 --> 00:06:20,153
I like her.

191
00:06:20,153 --> 00:06:21,421
Yeah, me too!

192
00:06:21,421 --> 00:06:22,789
(giggling)

193
00:06:22,789 --> 00:06:24,324
- Like a lot!
- Yeah.

194
00:06:24,324 --> 00:06:25,859
Yeah, okay.

195
00:06:25,859 --> 00:06:27,260
Yeah, you're hired. You got the job.

196
00:06:27,260 --> 00:06:29,463
Okay, uh, what's the catch?

197
00:06:29,463 --> 00:06:31,231
- No catch!
- Good.

198
00:06:31,231 --> 00:06:32,666
Oh, but there is one other thing.

199
00:06:32,666 --> 00:06:34,501
Um, I think there's something supernatural

200
00:06:34,501 --> 00:06:36,336
going on in my apartment.

201
00:06:36,336 --> 00:06:37,471
Do you think we could, like,

202
00:06:37,471 --> 00:06:39,306
work out some kind of deal?

203
00:06:39,306 --> 00:06:41,842
Yeah, but that's the... the
very definition of a catch.

204
00:06:41,842 --> 00:06:43,510
Kevin, please? I don't wanna lose this one.

205
00:06:43,510 --> 00:06:45,312
She's perfect.

206
00:06:45,312 --> 00:06:46,413
Plus I've always wanted

207
00:06:46,413 --> 00:06:49,116
a set of jugs like those.

208
00:06:49,116 --> 00:06:50,584
Me too.

209
00:06:50,584 --> 00:06:54,321



210
00:06:54,321 --> 00:06:55,555
So Beth,

211
00:06:55,555 --> 00:06:56,823
when was the last time

212
00:06:56,823 --> 00:07:00,193
you experienced anything strange?

213
00:07:00,193 --> 00:07:03,163
Last week, when I woke
up in a pool of water.

214
00:07:03,163 --> 00:07:04,498
I mean at first, I thought my dog

215
00:07:04,498 --> 00:07:05,532
had climbed into bed with me

216
00:07:05,532 --> 00:07:07,167
and pissed the sheets,

217
00:07:07,167 --> 00:07:09,169
but then I realized

218
00:07:09,169 --> 00:07:12,706
I have never owned a dog.

219
00:07:12,706 --> 00:07:13,807
Whoa.

220
00:07:13,807 --> 00:07:15,108
So I knew it had to be him.

221
00:07:15,108 --> 00:07:15,542
Who?

222
00:07:15,542 --> 00:07:16,309
Satan.

223
00:07:16,309 --> 00:07:17,110
Satan?

224
00:07:17,110 --> 00:07:18,111
Yeah, Lucifer.

225
00:07:18,111 --> 00:07:19,112
The dark prince?

226
00:07:19,112 --> 00:07:19,813
Yeah, the dark prince.

227
00:07:19,813 --> 00:07:20,747
Beelzebub.

228
00:07:20,747 --> 00:07:22,382
Like the antichrist?

229
00:07:22,382 --> 00:07:24,451
Yes, the lord of fire.

230
00:07:24,451 --> 00:07:26,153
Why the devil would the lord of fire

231
00:07:26,153 --> 00:07:28,188
be haunting you with water?

232
00:07:28,188 --> 00:07:29,456
I mean...

233
00:07:29,456 --> 00:07:31,858
Because he's trying to cool off.

234
00:07:31,858 --> 00:07:33,660
Right.

235
00:07:33,660 --> 00:07:35,295
I mean, how else do you explain

236
00:07:35,295 --> 00:07:36,797
that the hauntings didn't begin

237
00:07:36,797 --> 00:07:38,698
until I converted to Satanism?

238
00:07:38,698 --> 00:07:40,567
You're a Satanist now?

239
00:07:40,567 --> 00:07:41,568
I mean, I don't need you

240
00:07:41,568 --> 00:07:42,869
to exorcise him or anything.

241
00:07:42,869 --> 00:07:44,571
I just need you to help me talk to him.

242
00:07:44,571 --> 00:07:45,839
Yeah...

243
00:07:45,839 --> 00:07:47,841
This is a prime example of something

244
00:07:47,841 --> 00:07:51,111
I wish you'd have
mentioned in your interview.

245
00:07:51,111 --> 00:07:53,313
I thought you saw my tattoo?

246
00:07:53,313 --> 00:07:54,848
No.

247
00:07:54,848 --> 00:07:56,750
Uh, look,

248
00:07:56,750 --> 00:07:59,987
are you gonna help me talk to Satan or not?

249
00:08:00,287 --> 00:08:01,555



250
00:08:01,555 --> 00:08:02,556
What the hell?

251
00:08:02,556 --> 00:08:04,124
(laughing)

252
00:08:06,971 --> 00:08:09,674
Here Satan, Satan, Satan.

253
00:08:09,674 --> 00:08:11,176
Satan?

254
00:08:11,176 --> 00:08:13,178
Ya in here?

255
00:08:13,178 --> 00:08:14,479
Huh, buddy?

256
00:08:14,479 --> 00:08:16,648



257
00:08:16,648 --> 00:08:18,583
Hey... hey Satan there, bud.

258
00:08:18,583 --> 00:08:19,984
If you're, uh...

259
00:08:19,984 --> 00:08:21,186
if you're hiding behind the shower curtain,

260
00:08:21,186 --> 00:08:22,654
don't be scurred.

261
00:08:22,654 --> 00:08:25,723
Okay, one, two, three.

262
00:08:25,723 --> 00:08:27,225
- The spirits!
- Jesus, fuck!

263
00:08:27,225 --> 00:08:28,693
Motherfuck, shit, oh my God.

264
00:08:28,693 --> 00:08:30,495
Satan, don't kill me, please!

265
00:08:30,495 --> 00:08:31,029
Satan?

266
00:08:31,029 --> 00:08:32,664
Oh goodness, no.

267
00:08:32,664 --> 00:08:34,532
I'm Father Michael.

268
00:08:34,532 --> 00:08:36,067
The fuck?

269
00:08:36,067 --> 00:08:38,203
Why does your voice sound like that?

270
00:08:38,203 --> 00:08:39,704
Throat cancer.

271
00:08:39,704 --> 00:08:41,873
I mean, you bless one cigar factory.

272
00:08:41,873 --> 00:08:43,141
- Come on!
- Okay.

273
00:08:43,141 --> 00:08:44,209
All right, all right, got it.

274
00:08:44,209 --> 00:08:45,810
What are you doing here?

275
00:08:45,810 --> 00:08:47,178
Well, I'm Beth's childhood priest.

276
00:08:47,178 --> 00:08:50,181
And my business was to
baptize Beth as a baby...

277
00:08:50,181 --> 00:08:51,516
a whole bunch of babies actually,

278
00:08:51,516 --> 00:08:52,484
but I botched it.

279
00:08:52,484 --> 00:08:53,051
The whole batch?

280
00:08:53,051 --> 00:08:54,652
No just Beth.

281
00:08:54,652 --> 00:08:56,120
You see, Beth was the last baby of the day,

282
00:08:56,120 --> 00:08:57,822
and I had run out of holy water,

283
00:08:57,822 --> 00:09:00,225
so I reached for a nearby
regular glass of water,

284
00:09:00,225 --> 00:09:02,660
but turns out it was flavored.

285
00:09:02,660 --> 00:09:03,194
Lemon?

286
00:09:03,194 --> 00:09:05,029
Lemon-lime.

287
00:09:05,029 --> 00:09:06,698
I've regretted it ever since.

288
00:09:06,698 --> 00:09:08,166
And now that I see the evil turn

289
00:09:08,166 --> 00:09:10,702
that Beth's life has taken,

290
00:09:10,702 --> 00:09:12,804
I am determined to right that wrong.

291
00:09:12,804 --> 00:09:13,771
Okay, yeah.

292
00:09:13,771 --> 00:09:14,806
Yeah, all right, okay.

293
00:09:14,806 --> 00:09:15,607
Oh!

294
00:09:15,607 --> 00:09:16,941
Shh, shh, shh!

295
00:09:16,941 --> 00:09:18,176
Are you talking to Satan?

296
00:09:18,176 --> 00:09:19,611
What's he sayeth?

297
00:09:19,611 --> 00:09:20,945
I have some good news

298
00:09:20,945 --> 00:09:22,080
and some bad news.

299
00:09:22,080 --> 00:09:23,781
Uh, the bad news is

300
00:09:23,781 --> 00:09:25,483
it's not Satan.

301
00:09:25,483 --> 00:09:28,820
But the good news is it's not Satan!

302
00:09:28,820 --> 00:09:30,555
Well, then who the hell is it?

303
00:09:30,555 --> 00:09:31,956
Uh, it's your childhood priest!

304
00:09:31,956 --> 00:09:33,124
It's Father Michael!

305
00:09:33,124 --> 00:09:35,059
He... he botched your baptism as a baby,

306
00:09:35,059 --> 00:09:36,694
and he wants a do-over,

307
00:09:36,694 --> 00:09:37,996
I think, if he can do that.

308
00:09:37,996 --> 00:09:39,697
- A baptism?
- Yeah.

309
00:09:39,697 --> 00:09:41,466
To keep me out of hell?

310
00:09:41,466 --> 00:09:42,567
I don't know. I think so.

311
00:09:42,567 --> 00:09:44,502
I am a Satanist!

312
00:09:44,502 --> 00:09:46,504
- I want to go to hell!
- Right.

313
00:09:46,504 --> 00:09:47,772
Now either Father Michael's gone

314
00:09:47,772 --> 00:09:49,107
by the time I get back from work,

315
00:09:49,107 --> 00:09:52,977
or you are never having sex with this body.

316
00:09:52,977 --> 00:09:54,012
What? No, no, no!

317
00:09:54,012 --> 00:09:56,047
No, no, no, hold on, that...

318
00:09:56,047 --> 00:09:57,081
That's not the deal. That wasn't the deal.

319
00:09:57,081 --> 00:09:58,116
The deal was

320
00:09:58,116 --> 00:09:59,450
that I just had to talk to him

321
00:09:59,450 --> 00:10:00,718
and... and I'd do the sex

322
00:10:00,718 --> 00:10:02,453
with your body!

323
00:10:02,453 --> 00:10:03,488
Dude, deal?

324
00:10:03,488 --> 00:10:05,056
It's fucking Craigslist.

325
00:10:05,056 --> 00:10:05,957
You're lucky I'm not stealing

326
00:10:05,957 --> 00:10:07,225
your liver right now.

327
00:10:07,225 --> 00:10:08,860
Get rid of him.

328
00:10:08,860 --> 00:10:10,161
Excuse me, son.

329
00:10:10,161 --> 00:10:11,763
Did I hear directly that you and Beth

330
00:10:11,763 --> 00:10:13,798
are planning on having sex out of wedlock?

331
00:10:13,798 --> 00:10:15,934
Well, that depends.

332
00:10:15,934 --> 00:10:17,835
What's a wedlock?

333
00:10:17,835 --> 00:10:20,738
And only then, according to Corinthians,

334
00:10:20,738 --> 00:10:22,774
can you accept Jesus into your heart.

335
00:10:22,774 --> 00:10:23,875
Okay.

336
00:10:23,875 --> 00:10:26,210
So it's not a warlock?

337
00:10:26,210 --> 00:10:27,745
No!

338
00:10:27,745 --> 00:10:29,247
This has been a complete waste of time.

339
00:10:29,247 --> 00:10:30,782
What are we doing here?

340
00:10:30,782 --> 00:10:32,150
You're never gonna leave Beth alone

341
00:10:32,150 --> 00:10:33,651
unless she agrees to get baptized,

342
00:10:33,651 --> 00:10:35,186
and she's never gonna agree, so...

343
00:10:35,186 --> 00:10:37,889
Well, technically she
doesn't have to agree.

344
00:10:37,889 --> 00:10:39,223
Babies get baptized all the time

345
00:10:39,223 --> 00:10:41,859
without agreeing to it.

346
00:10:41,859 --> 00:10:43,194
Father, what are you...

347
00:10:43,194 --> 00:10:44,829
Are you saying we should trick her?

348
00:10:44,829 --> 00:10:46,598
No, I'm implying we should trick her.

349
00:10:46,598 --> 00:10:47,865
What? No!

350
00:10:47,865 --> 00:10:49,067
If I do that, am I...

351
00:10:49,067 --> 00:10:50,535
am I gonna go to hell?

352
00:10:50,535 --> 00:10:51,502
No, you're not gonna go to hell!

353
00:10:51,502 --> 00:10:52,704
How do you know for sure?

354
00:10:52,704 --> 00:10:53,805
Why do you ask so many questions?

355
00:10:53,805 --> 00:10:54,606
Just have faith.

356
00:10:54,606 --> 00:10:55,773
Have faith!

357
00:10:55,773 --> 00:10:56,808
I don't have much of that.

358
00:10:56,808 --> 00:10:58,476
All you have to do is fool her

359
00:10:58,476 --> 00:11:01,145
into accepting Jesus
as her lord and savior,

360
00:11:01,145 --> 00:11:02,814
and then you just throw
some holy water onto her,

361
00:11:02,814 --> 00:11:04,549
and you say, "I baptize you in the name"

362
00:11:04,549 --> 00:11:07,085
"of the Father, the Son,
the Holy Spirit!" Come on!

363
00:11:07,085 --> 00:11:08,486
Great, okay, so I just need

364
00:11:08,486 --> 00:11:09,921
to get her someplace loud enough

365
00:11:09,921 --> 00:11:10,922
that she can't hear what I'm saying,

366
00:11:10,922 --> 00:11:12,056
someplace dark enough that

367
00:11:12,056 --> 00:11:13,558
she can't see that it's me,

368
00:11:13,558 --> 00:11:14,993
and someplace where I can just, like,

369
00:11:14,993 --> 00:11:16,427
douse her with water and she won't try

370
00:11:16,427 --> 00:11:17,996
and figure out what I'm doing!

371
00:11:17,996 --> 00:11:18,930
That's... that's gonna take

372
00:11:18,930 --> 00:11:21,165
a fucking miracle, man!

373
00:11:21,165 --> 00:11:22,166
All righty.

374
00:11:22,166 --> 00:11:24,636
I am off to Loud and Dark's

375
00:11:24,636 --> 00:11:25,837
for the wet t-shirt contest.

376
00:11:25,837 --> 00:11:27,672
Mmkay.

377
00:11:27,672 --> 00:11:29,007
Please don't steal anything while I'm gone.

378
00:11:29,007 --> 00:11:29,907
Mm-hm.

379
00:11:29,907 --> 00:11:30,708
I mean it.

380
00:11:30,708 --> 00:11:32,043
Hope you win!

381
00:11:32,043 --> 00:11:33,177
I hope so, too.

382
00:11:33,177 --> 00:11:34,545
- Oh...
- Oh!

383
00:11:34,545 --> 00:11:37,048



384
00:11:37,048 --> 00:11:38,016
How about this one?

385
00:11:38,016 --> 00:11:38,783
Yup.

386
00:11:38,783 --> 00:11:39,917
Or this?

387
00:11:39,917 --> 00:11:42,720
Uh, either one.

388
00:11:42,720 --> 00:11:43,988
What's up?

389
00:11:43,988 --> 00:11:45,490
Nothing!

390
00:11:45,490 --> 00:11:47,125
I just... you know my whole stance

391
00:11:47,125 --> 00:11:48,526
on Solids dating See-Throughs.

392
00:11:48,526 --> 00:11:49,927
I... I just don't see why

393
00:11:49,927 --> 00:11:52,096
you're going through all this trouble.

394
00:11:52,096 --> 00:11:54,132
- Trouble?
- Of forcing something...

395
00:11:54,132 --> 00:11:56,134
... that isn't really supposed to be.

396
00:11:56,134 --> 00:11:59,671
There's a ton of eligible
ghosts out there, Sue!

397
00:11:59,671 --> 00:12:02,640
I hear Saddam Hussein
is bomb at eating box.

398
00:12:02,640 --> 00:12:04,575
Oh, Millie, gross.

399
00:12:04,575 --> 00:12:06,577
This isn't about just the sex.

400
00:12:06,577 --> 00:12:07,945
Don't you believe in soulmates?

401
00:12:07,945 --> 00:12:09,847
No!

402
00:12:09,847 --> 00:12:11,182
But that's a really great name

403
00:12:11,182 --> 00:12:12,784
for a ghost dating website

404
00:12:12,784 --> 00:12:14,185
that I'm about to create, so thank you.

405
00:12:14,185 --> 00:12:15,653
The point is, Kevin and I,

406
00:12:15,653 --> 00:12:17,522
we... we get along really well,

407
00:12:17,522 --> 00:12:20,658
but it's time to get physical.

408
00:12:20,658 --> 00:12:21,759
You're right!

409
00:12:21,759 --> 00:12:23,061
I'm sorry, it's...

410
00:12:23,061 --> 00:12:24,729
the whole dying on my period thing.

411
00:12:24,729 --> 00:12:28,032
It's just... I'm just
so hormonal, you know?

412
00:12:28,032 --> 00:12:32,103
But I am really happy for you, girl.

413
00:12:32,103 --> 00:12:33,971
Oh my God!

414
00:12:33,971 --> 00:12:35,573
You would look so hot

415
00:12:35,573 --> 00:12:37,141
wearing a body wearing this.

416
00:12:37,141 --> 00:12:38,609
- You think?
- Totally!

417
00:12:38,609 --> 00:12:39,544
Let's just hope he doesn't

418
00:12:39,544 --> 00:12:41,145
fall for the sex vessel.

419
00:12:41,145 --> 00:12:42,980



420
00:12:42,980 --> 00:12:44,615
Oh.

421
00:12:44,615 --> 00:12:45,683
What are you wearing?

422
00:12:45,683 --> 00:12:48,953
It's the only disguise I could find!

423
00:12:48,953 --> 00:12:50,054
Hello, there.

424
00:12:50,054 --> 00:12:51,789
Shabbat Salami.

425
00:12:51,789 --> 00:12:53,658
I am looking to locate the manager

426
00:12:53,658 --> 00:12:55,693
of this fine establishment.

427
00:12:55,693 --> 00:12:56,594
Well, you found him.

428
00:12:56,594 --> 00:12:57,495
Oh!

429
00:12:57,495 --> 00:12:58,896
Donovan Peters.

430
00:12:58,896 --> 00:12:59,664
And you are?

431
00:12:59,664 --> 00:13:01,799
Rabbi Peters.

432
00:13:01,799 --> 00:13:03,835
No relation.

433
00:13:03,835 --> 00:13:04,869
So what can I do you for?

434
00:13:04,869 --> 00:13:05,770
Well, my friend, it's more

435
00:13:05,770 --> 00:13:06,971
what I can do you for.

436
00:13:06,971 --> 00:13:08,473
I would very much like to emcee

437
00:13:08,473 --> 00:13:10,675
the wet t-shirt contest here tonight!

438
00:13:10,675 --> 00:13:12,009
I emcee the wet t-shirt contest.

439
00:13:12,009 --> 00:13:13,511
I understand. Maybe we can

440
00:13:13,511 --> 00:13:14,846
come to some sort of arrangement here,

441
00:13:14,846 --> 00:13:17,115
you know, we can have
some sort of role-swap.

442
00:13:17,115 --> 00:13:18,549
Uh, you know, I emcee

443
00:13:18,549 --> 00:13:19,784
the wet t-shirt contest

444
00:13:19,784 --> 00:13:21,452
and you can, uh, come to my temple

445
00:13:21,452 --> 00:13:23,187
and cut the skin off of baby penises.

446
00:13:23,187 --> 00:13:24,555
No, I'm sorry, rabbi.

447
00:13:24,555 --> 00:13:26,224
That's, uh...

448
00:13:26,224 --> 00:13:29,093
that's not gonna happen.

449
00:13:29,093 --> 00:13:31,529
See, uh...

450
00:13:31,529 --> 00:13:34,665
See, this place is my temple.

451
00:13:34,665 --> 00:13:36,934
And the wet t-shirt contests

452
00:13:36,934 --> 00:13:38,936
are my weekly mass.

453
00:13:38,936 --> 00:13:41,105
Oh, Donovan.

454
00:13:41,105 --> 00:13:42,540
Donovan, Donovan, I had hoped

455
00:13:42,540 --> 00:13:44,475
it wouldn't come to this.

456
00:13:44,475 --> 00:13:47,678
Either I emcee that wet
t-shirt contest tonight,

457
00:13:47,678 --> 00:13:51,182
or you are going to get very, very wet.

458
00:13:51,182 --> 00:13:53,751
Very wet.

459
00:13:53,751 --> 00:13:56,487
Oh...

460
00:13:56,487 --> 00:13:58,589
really, dude?

461
00:13:58,589 --> 00:14:00,158
You really wanna do this?

462
00:14:03,694 --> 00:14:04,962
What are you doing... what are you doing?

463
00:14:04,962 --> 00:14:06,998
The Lord's work!

464
00:14:06,998 --> 00:14:08,599
In nomine Patris,

465
00:14:08,599 --> 00:14:10,902
et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti.

466
00:14:10,902 --> 00:14:12,937
Amen.

467
00:14:12,937 --> 00:14:14,605
Pater Noster...

468
00:14:14,605 --> 00:14:17,475
Who's ready to see some t-shirts get wet?

469
00:14:17,475 --> 00:14:18,743
(cheering)

470
00:14:18,743 --> 00:14:21,145
(Father Michael speaking Latin)

471
00:14:21,145 --> 00:14:24,081



472
00:14:24,081 --> 00:14:25,550
But ladies, I have one very,

473
00:14:25,550 --> 00:14:27,585
very important question for you!

474
00:14:27,585 --> 00:14:28,986
Dost thou desire by faith in Jesus Christ

475
00:14:28,986 --> 00:14:29,954
to obtain eternal life

476
00:14:29,954 --> 00:14:31,189
through the church of God?

477
00:14:31,189 --> 00:14:34,826
And who wants some water on their titties?

478
00:14:34,826 --> 00:14:35,893
(cheering)

479
00:14:35,893 --> 00:14:40,064
(Father Michael speaking Latin)

480
00:14:40,064 --> 00:14:41,833
And I now baptize you...

481
00:14:41,833 --> 00:14:43,167
(Father Michael speaking Latin)

482
00:14:43,167 --> 00:14:44,635
In the name of the Father...

483
00:14:44,635 --> 00:14:46,737
(Father Michael speaking Latin)

484
00:14:46,737 --> 00:14:47,638
... and of the Son...

485
00:14:47,638 --> 00:14:51,475
(speaking Latin)

486
00:14:51,475 --> 00:14:53,711



487
00:14:53,711 --> 00:14:54,712
And of the...

488
00:14:54,712 --> 00:14:56,714
Holy shit! Oh my God.

489
00:14:56,714 --> 00:14:57,748
Get the fuck out

490
00:14:57,748 --> 00:14:59,717
of my spiritual sanctuary,

491
00:14:59,717 --> 00:15:02,119
you God damn heathen.

492
00:15:05,961 --> 00:15:07,963
Aw, fuck!

493
00:15:07,963 --> 00:15:09,365
Fuck! It was going so well,

494
00:15:09,365 --> 00:15:10,499
the whole thing was going perfectly.

495
00:15:10,499 --> 00:15:11,634
Fuck!

496
00:15:11,634 --> 00:15:13,402
(groaning)

497
00:15:13,402 --> 00:15:14,937
God damn it.

498
00:15:14,937 --> 00:15:17,439
Why must you test me this way, my Lord?

499
00:15:17,439 --> 00:15:19,642
Ah, this is my fault, Father.

500
00:15:19,642 --> 00:15:22,177
You know, clearly God does not want me

501
00:15:22,177 --> 00:15:24,046
to have sex with my girlfriend.

502
00:15:24,046 --> 00:15:26,382
Kevin, God doesn't care

503
00:15:26,382 --> 00:15:28,317
if you have sex with Beth.

504
00:15:28,317 --> 00:15:30,986
He just wants you to marry her first.

505
00:15:30,986 --> 00:15:32,521
Yeah, I got a... I got a...

506
00:15:32,521 --> 00:15:34,356
I got a little confession to make, Father.

507
00:15:34,356 --> 00:15:37,559
Beth is not my girlfriend.

508
00:15:39,161 --> 00:15:41,430
- I see.
- Yeah.

509
00:15:41,430 --> 00:15:44,066
Well, how about you
give me two "Our Fathers"

510
00:15:44,066 --> 00:15:46,268
and three "Hail Marys"
and we'll call it even.

511
00:15:46,268 --> 00:15:48,137
No, no, no, I mean...

512
00:15:48,137 --> 00:15:50,606
I mean my girlfriend is dead.

513
00:15:50,606 --> 00:15:52,541
All right: four "Hail Marys."

514
00:15:52,541 --> 00:15:54,243
No, no, I'm not making myself clear.

515
00:15:54,243 --> 00:15:56,979
My girlfriend Sue,

516
00:15:56,979 --> 00:15:58,614
she's a ghost, okay?

517
00:15:58,614 --> 00:16:00,182
And... and Beth is just

518
00:16:00,182 --> 00:16:02,384
this very surprisingly accommodating woman

519
00:16:02,384 --> 00:16:03,986
that we met online who was willing

520
00:16:03,986 --> 00:16:05,888
to let my girlfriend possess her body

521
00:16:05,888 --> 00:16:07,189
while she was super high

522
00:16:07,189 --> 00:16:09,024
so I can have sex with it.

523
00:16:09,024 --> 00:16:10,426
You understand?

524
00:16:10,426 --> 00:16:12,861
How many "Hail Marys"
are we looking at now?

525
00:16:14,897 --> 00:16:17,933
I knew Beth had lost her way,

526
00:16:17,933 --> 00:16:20,336
but I didn't think she was this lost.

527
00:16:20,336 --> 00:16:22,504
Pretty lost.

528
00:16:22,504 --> 00:16:24,406
Well, I'm too late for her.

529
00:16:24,406 --> 00:16:26,308
And I've been so consumed

530
00:16:26,308 --> 00:16:28,210
with trying to baptize Beth

531
00:16:28,210 --> 00:16:30,546
that I forgot about
the most important tenet

532
00:16:30,546 --> 00:16:33,082
of the church:

533
00:16:33,082 --> 00:16:35,884
spreading His word.

534
00:16:35,884 --> 00:16:38,120
Now that I'm a ghost, I can...

535
00:16:38,120 --> 00:16:40,155
reach all of those other lost souls

536
00:16:40,155 --> 00:16:42,291
and convert them,

537
00:16:42,291 --> 00:16:43,659
or at least try.

538
00:16:43,659 --> 00:16:47,229
Well, it is a numbers game after all.

539
00:16:47,229 --> 00:16:50,899
You can have your night of sin with Beth.

540
00:16:50,899 --> 00:16:54,169
I'm not going to be bothering her anymore.

541
00:16:54,169 --> 00:16:56,205
And...

542
00:16:56,205 --> 00:16:57,239
thank you, Kevin.

543
00:16:57,239 --> 00:16:59,208
Uh, for what?

544
00:16:59,208 --> 00:17:01,043
Helping me find my way.

545
00:17:01,043 --> 00:17:02,978
Yeah. Yeah, you got it.

546
00:17:02,978 --> 00:17:05,180



547
00:17:05,180 --> 00:17:06,348
So how much do I eat?

548
00:17:06,348 --> 00:17:08,951
You eat the whole one.

549
00:17:08,951 --> 00:17:10,452
Yeah, just, uh, don't waste it, okay?

550
00:17:10,452 --> 00:17:11,620
That's all we have.

551
00:17:11,620 --> 00:17:13,522
I'm gonna go check on Sue.

552
00:17:17,526 --> 00:17:19,294
(giggling)

553
00:17:19,294 --> 00:17:20,496
Okay.

554
00:17:22,297 --> 00:17:24,199
Oh my God, you bought lingerie.

555
00:17:24,199 --> 00:17:25,367
Yeah, you like it?

556
00:17:25,367 --> 00:17:26,402
It's see-through

557
00:17:26,402 --> 00:17:28,504
to remind you of me.

558
00:17:28,504 --> 00:17:30,839
I just don't want you to
forget that I'm in there.

559
00:17:30,839 --> 00:17:31,907
What are you talking about? I'm not...

560
00:17:31,907 --> 00:17:33,442
Sue, hey.

561
00:17:33,442 --> 00:17:35,110
This whole thing, the whole night

562
00:17:35,110 --> 00:17:37,112
is about you and me, okay?

563
00:17:37,112 --> 00:17:39,014
That girl in there, she's, like,

564
00:17:39,014 --> 00:17:40,382
just some body we're using.

565
00:17:40,382 --> 00:17:41,617
That's it.

566
00:17:41,617 --> 00:17:43,452
A super hot body.

567
00:17:43,452 --> 00:17:45,120
Yeah, she has a super hot body

568
00:17:45,120 --> 00:17:48,891
that you're gonna be inside of.

569
00:17:48,891 --> 00:17:50,526
That we'll both be inside of.

570
00:17:50,526 --> 00:17:53,028
(giggling)

571
00:17:53,028 --> 00:17:54,163
Right?

572
00:17:54,163 --> 00:17:55,330
Yeah.

573
00:17:55,330 --> 00:17:56,632
Okay, okay.

574
00:17:56,632 --> 00:17:58,300
Ew!

575
00:17:58,300 --> 00:17:59,601
But hey, hey, listen, listen.

576
00:17:59,601 --> 00:18:01,437
Honestly if you're uncomfortable

577
00:18:01,437 --> 00:18:02,604
or if you want me to call it off,

578
00:18:02,604 --> 00:18:03,539
I will call the whole thing off

579
00:18:03,539 --> 00:18:05,073
right now. Okay?

580
00:18:05,073 --> 00:18:06,942
And she'll just be some girl in there

581
00:18:06,942 --> 00:18:11,346
having a horrifying
mushroom trip all by herself.

582
00:18:11,346 --> 00:18:13,382
No, I wanna do this.

583
00:18:13,382 --> 00:18:14,116
You wanna do it?

584
00:18:14,116 --> 00:18:16,185
Yes.

585
00:18:16,185 --> 00:18:19,054
Ready or not, here we come.

586
00:18:19,054 --> 00:18:20,889
Okay, so you're not ready.

587
00:18:20,889 --> 00:18:22,324
Oh my God, I think she's OD'ing!

588
00:18:22,324 --> 00:18:23,559
What? What do you mean, how do you OD

589
00:18:23,559 --> 00:18:24,893
on one mushroom?

590
00:18:24,893 --> 00:18:26,061
Maybe it's poisonous!

591
00:18:26,061 --> 00:18:27,129
Of course it's poisonous, Sue!

592
00:18:27,129 --> 00:18:28,230
It's a magic mushroom.

593
00:18:28,230 --> 00:18:30,232
The magic is the poison.

594
00:18:30,232 --> 00:18:31,500
Beth? Stop, stop, stop!

595
00:18:31,500 --> 00:18:32,534
Beth, Beth!

596
00:18:32,534 --> 00:18:34,336
Stay with me.

597
00:18:34,336 --> 00:18:36,004
Jesus loves you.

598
00:18:36,004 --> 00:18:37,573
Father Michael?

599
00:18:37,573 --> 00:18:39,141
Oh!

600
00:18:39,141 --> 00:18:40,142
You didn't think I was gonna give up

601
00:18:40,142 --> 00:18:41,577
that easily, did you?

602
00:18:41,577 --> 00:18:43,245
(screaming)

603
00:18:43,245 --> 00:18:44,546
What's happening to me?

604
00:18:44,546 --> 00:18:46,014
Shut up, you whore! Shut up!

605
00:18:46,014 --> 00:18:46,949
Oh my God, I think there's

606
00:18:46,949 --> 00:18:48,217
a demon inside of her.

607
00:18:48,217 --> 00:18:49,918
Should we call a priest?

608
00:18:49,918 --> 00:18:51,420
It's a priest that's inside of her!

609
00:18:51,420 --> 00:18:53,388
Well, uh, should we call a Satanist?

610
00:18:53,388 --> 00:18:55,858
She is a Satanist, Sue. Keep up.

611
00:18:55,858 --> 00:18:56,959
What?

612
00:18:56,959 --> 00:18:59,027



613
00:18:59,027 --> 00:18:59,561
Oh my God!

614
00:18:59,561 --> 00:19:00,896
Ah, ahh!

615
00:19:00,896 --> 00:19:02,297
No, no, no, get back here!

616
00:19:02,297 --> 00:19:04,399
Get back here with our sex vessel.

617
00:19:04,399 --> 00:19:06,535
Thou shalt not steal!

618
00:19:11,273 --> 00:19:15,877



619
00:19:15,877 --> 00:19:18,446
Father Michael!

620
00:19:18,446 --> 00:19:19,781
No, no.

621
00:19:19,781 --> 00:19:20,949
Okay, can you stop doing that?

622
00:19:20,949 --> 00:19:23,285
You're making me nauseous.

623
00:19:23,285 --> 00:19:24,619
You're making me dizzy.

624
00:19:24,619 --> 00:19:28,619



625
00:19:38,466 --> 00:19:40,669
Dost I desire by the faith in Jesus Christ

626
00:19:40,669 --> 00:19:44,139
to obtain eternal life in the church of...

627
00:19:44,139 --> 00:19:46,408
Ah, no!

628
00:19:46,408 --> 00:19:47,709
Yes I do.

629
00:19:47,709 --> 00:19:49,778
I baptize you in the name of the Father

630
00:19:49,778 --> 00:19:52,581
and of the Son and of the Holy...

631
00:19:52,581 --> 00:19:53,448



632
00:19:53,448 --> 00:19:54,549
Ah, ah!

633
00:19:54,549 --> 00:19:58,549



634
00:20:03,258 --> 00:20:04,492
Beth.

635
00:20:04,492 --> 00:20:05,293
Beth!

636
00:20:05,293 --> 00:20:06,261
Beth, wake up.

637
00:20:06,261 --> 00:20:06,728
Hey, hey.

638
00:20:06,728 --> 00:20:08,330
Jesus?

639
00:20:08,330 --> 00:20:09,364
Jesus? No, no, no.

640
00:20:09,364 --> 00:20:10,632
It's me, Pac.

641
00:20:10,632 --> 00:20:12,434
No, not you.

642
00:20:12,434 --> 00:20:14,836
(whispering voice)

643
00:20:14,836 --> 00:20:17,739



644
00:20:17,739 --> 00:20:20,275
I never should have doubted you, my savior.

645
00:20:20,275 --> 00:20:22,210
Shit.

646
00:20:22,300 --> 00:20:23,568
- Kevin?
- Sue!

647
00:20:23,568 --> 00:20:25,370
Oh thank fucking Christ you're here.

648
00:20:25,370 --> 00:20:26,905
Beth, Beth. Sue's here. Come on, come on,

649
00:20:26,905 --> 00:20:27,872
if we're gonna finish what we started,

650
00:20:27,872 --> 00:20:28,940
we gotta do it now, okay?

651
00:20:29,020 --> 00:20:30,455
Here, now.

652
00:20:30,455 --> 00:20:31,556
I can't.

653
00:20:31,556 --> 00:20:32,957
I'm sorry.

654
00:20:32,957 --> 00:20:34,993
I made a promise to Jesus.

655
00:20:34,993 --> 00:20:39,030
He needs me as his vessel.

656
00:20:39,030 --> 00:20:40,065
Oh boy.

657
00:20:40,065 --> 00:20:41,032
You really get around,

658
00:20:41,032 --> 00:20:42,133
don't ya?

659
00:20:42,133 --> 00:20:46,133



660
00:20:51,609 --> 00:20:54,646
Oh God.

661
00:20:54,646 --> 00:20:56,114
Damn it, do you think
I should go after her?

662
00:20:56,114 --> 00:20:58,016
I don't know! You think
she'll change her mind?

663
00:20:58,016 --> 00:20:59,751
Change her mind? No, I meant

664
00:20:59,751 --> 00:21:00,852
maybe I can get some money from her

665
00:21:00,852 --> 00:21:01,886
for the exorcism?

666
00:21:01,886 --> 00:21:03,721
- You think?
- Oh.

667
00:21:03,721 --> 00:21:04,923
Do you... do you want me to call

668
00:21:04,923 --> 00:21:06,591
the girl with the herpes tattoo?

669
00:21:06,591 --> 00:21:08,359
- No.
- Okay.

670
00:21:08,429 --> 00:21:09,964
Well, we're out of vessels,

671
00:21:09,964 --> 00:21:14,102
and we're out of drugs, so...

672
00:21:14,102 --> 00:21:15,603
Maybe Father Michael was right?

673
00:21:15,603 --> 00:21:17,705
Maybe I should be saving myself for you.

674
00:21:17,705 --> 00:21:18,907
What, for marriage?

675
00:21:18,907 --> 00:21:20,909
No, no, no, for death.

676
00:21:20,909 --> 00:21:21,876
I mean check me out,

677
00:21:21,876 --> 00:21:22,710
I don't think I have

678
00:21:22,710 --> 00:21:24,479
much longer to go.

679
00:21:24,479 --> 00:21:26,948



680
00:21:26,948 --> 00:21:29,417
Sue, I don't... I don't...

681
00:21:29,417 --> 00:21:32,587
we don't need to have,
like, physical contact

682
00:21:32,587 --> 00:21:34,455
to have a real relationship, right?

683
00:21:34,455 --> 00:21:35,657
I mean, we have a great time together,

684
00:21:35,657 --> 00:21:36,858
we've got each other,

685
00:21:36,858 --> 00:21:37,926
we spend tons of time together.

686
00:21:37,926 --> 00:21:39,527
- Like...
- Totally.

687
00:21:39,527 --> 00:21:40,995
Sex would be awesome,

688
00:21:40,995 --> 00:21:43,631
but we don't, like, need it, right?

689
00:21:43,631 --> 00:21:44,866
Oh, right.

690
00:21:44,866 --> 00:21:46,000
That makes sense, right?

691
00:21:46,000 --> 00:21:46,935
Sure.

692
00:21:46,935 --> 00:21:48,002
Yeah.

693
00:21:48,002 --> 00:21:50,405



694
00:21:52,840 --> 00:21:56,840
- synced and corrected by chamallow -
- www.addic7ed.com -

695
00:21:56,890 --> 00:22:01,440
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